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Thread: Fantastic February...

  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by GLOCKROCKER View Post
    I see she is now leaving....
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  2. #12
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    Young Sheryl brings home her fiance Matt to meet her parents.After a delicious dinner,her mother tells her father to find out about the young man. The father invites Matt to his study for a drink.
    “So what are your plans?” the father asks the young man. “I am an Old Testament(Torah) researcher,”he replies.”an Old Testament researcher,interesting.” Sheryl’s father says. “Admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in,as she’s accustomed to?” “I will study,” Matt replies, “and God will provide for us.”
    “And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?” asks the father. “I will concentrate on my studies,” the young man replies, “and God will provide for us.”
    “And kids?” asks the father. “How will you support your kids?” “Don’t worry, sir. God will provide,” replies Matt again.The conversation proceeds like this and each time the father questions the young idealist insists that ‘God will provide’.
    When Matt went, the mother asks,”How did it go,Honey?” The father answers, “He has no job and no plans,but the good new is he thinks ‘I am God’.

  3. #13
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    Dear Abby.....I need help on this question.
    "Life Member NRA"
    I am addicted to brake fluid...don't worry I can STOP at anytime!

  4. #14
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    One day, married Jade who wanted to know how her husband Max would react if she left without telling him where she had gone.
    Jade decided to write a letter to her husband.She writes, she is tired of him and didn’t want to live with him anymore.
    After writing the letter, Jade put it on the table in the bedroom and then climbed under the bed to hide until her husband got home.
    When he eventually came back home, he saw the letter on the table and read it.
    After a few moments of silence, he picked up the pencil and added something to the letter.
    Then Max started to get changed, whistling happy tunes and singing and dancing while he did so. He took his phone and dialed a number.
    His wife listened from under the bed as he started chatting to someone.
    “Hey babe, ready, I’m just changing clothes then will join you,” he said.
    “As for the other fool, it finally dawned on her that I was fooling around on her and left. I was really wrong to have married her; I wish you and me had met earlier. See you soon, honey!”
    Then he hung up and walked out of the room.
    In tears and very upset, she climbed out from under the bed and stumbled over to read what her unfaithful husband had written on the end of her letter.
    Through teary eyes, she read: “I could see your feet you idiot, I am going out to supermarket for buy milk and bread .”

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by dustnchips View Post
    One day, married Jade who wanted to know how her husband Max would react if she left without telling him where she had gone.
    Jade decided to write a letter to her husband.She writes, she is tired of him and didn’t want to live with him anymore.
    After writing the letter, Jade put it on the table in the bedroom and then climbed under the bed to hide until her husband got home.
    When he eventually came back home, he saw the letter on the table and read it.
    After a few moments of silence, he picked up the pencil and added something to the letter.
    Then Max started to get changed, whistling happy tunes and singing and dancing while he did so. He took his phone and dialed a number.
    His wife listened from under the bed as he started chatting to someone.
    “Hey babe, ready, I’m just changing clothes then will join you,” he said.
    “As for the other fool, it finally dawned on her that I was fooling around on her and left. I was really wrong to have married her; I wish you and me had met earlier. See you soon, honey!”
    Then he hung up and walked out of the room.
    In tears and very upset, she climbed out from under the bed and stumbled over to read what her unfaithful husband had written on the end of her letter.
    Through teary eyes, she read: “I could see your feet you idiot, I am going out to supermarket for buy milk and bread .”
    Nobody said tall blondes were good at hiding :=]
    "Life Member NRA"
    I am addicted to brake fluid...don't worry I can STOP at anytime!

  6. #16
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    She isn't tall and isn't a blonde.
    -- Max
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  7. #17
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    Borrowed this one from an Old Salt Site I visit.


    THE MASTER CHIEF AND THE EMAIL!
    A Master Chief and his wife stationed at Naval Air Station, Brunswick, Maine decided to go on leave to Florida in January to get out of the cold.
    They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.
    Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules.
    So, the Master Chief left Brunswick and flew to Florida on Thursday. His wife would fly down the following day.
    The Master Chief checked into the hotel.
    There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife to let her know that he arrived safely.
    However, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.
    Meanwhile.....somewhere in Kansas, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral.
    He was a minister of many years who was called home to glory following a sudden heart attack.
    The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages from relatives and friends.
    After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted!
    The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the email on the computer screen which read:
    To: My Loving Wife
    Subject: I've Arrived

    I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones.
    I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
    Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.


    P.S. Sure is hot down here!

    NRA Benefactor

  8. #18
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    Lol...good one!
    "Life Member NRA"
    I am addicted to brake fluid...don't worry I can STOP at anytime!

  9. #19
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    Default New No Trespassing Sign .....

    New No Trespassing Sign ....seems to be working!
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    I am addicted to brake fluid...don't worry I can STOP at anytime!

  10. #20
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    Sep 2011
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    Central MN
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    Here's another example of the witch hunt caused by the flood of sexual abuse allegations:

    I just read of a professional, who after 7 yrs of medical school and training, was fired for one minor indiscretion. He slept with one of his patients and can no longer work in the profession. What a waste of time, effort, training and money. He's still paying off his school loans. This just goes to show you, one minor mistake can ruin your life.



    Thoughts and prayers for him and his family. The article says he really is a great guy and a brilliant "veterinarian" !







    "Never pet a burning dog"

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