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Thread: HoHoHo....it's December...

  1. #31
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Colorado
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    Perfectly describes how I today feel about life! Thank you!
    NRA Benefactor

  2. #32
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Twin Cities MN.
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    3,573

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    Navy Cooks

    An admiral visited one of the ships of the line under his command.
    While eating breakfast with the crew he was impressed to see the Naval insignia stamped on every biscuit.
    He went to the Chief cook to ask how this feat was done, so it could be used on other ships under his command.
    The Chief replied, "I'd be glad to share that with you, Admiral. After each biscuit is cut, I just slap it here against my belt buckle which bears the Navy insignia."
    Horrified, the Admiral exclaims, "That's very unhygienic!"
    The Chief shrugs and replies, "Well, if that's the way you feel, Sir, I suggest you avoid the donuts."
    "Life Member NRA"
    I am addicted to brake fluid...don't worry I can STOP at anytime!

  3. #33
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Twin Cities MN.
    Posts
    3,573

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    "Life Member NRA"
    I am addicted to brake fluid...don't worry I can STOP at anytime!

  4. #34
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Location
    Wisconsin
    Posts
    4,265

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    An elderly couple, a middle aged couple and a young couple all wanted to join the same church. The pastor met with them and explained, "We have a requirement to join the church. You must abstain from sex for 2 weeks". They all nodded in agreement. 2 weeks later the pastor finds the elderly couple. He inquires, "So, did you abstain from sex for 2 weeks?" "Oh yes", the man said, "It was no trouble". "Wonderful", the pastor said, "you'll be able to join the church". The pastor then tracks down the middle aged couple. "So, did you manage to abstain from sex?" "It was very difficult, and the second week, I had to sleep downstairs all week just to make it, but we were successful". "Wonderful" the pastor exclaimed, "You'll now be able to join the church!" He looks and looks and finally finds the young couple. "So, did you manage to abstain from sex?" The young man says, "We were doing so well the first few days, but then my wife climbed up a ladder to get a can of paint, and I was staring at her @$$ and we just couldn't help ourselves". The pastor says, "that's very disappointing, and you realize that I cannot allow you to join the church". The guy says, Yeah, I know, we're not welcome at Home Depot anymore either".

  5. #35
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Colorado
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    4,270

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    Quote Originally Posted by jeepster09 View Post
    Excellent! Thank you!
    NRA Benefactor

  6. #36
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Posts
    155

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    PLEASE keep them coming fellas! And, thanks for the one’s you’ve already posted!!!

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