November Niceties

[340pd]

President Trump should make a declaration that he is identifying as a woman. The left will have to admit the absurdity of their gender ideology or accept and celebrate “Donna Trump” as the first woman President, thus beating Hillary, Liz Warren, Amy Klobuchar, Kamala Harris and Kirsten Gillibrand to the glorious goal of one of their “female firsts”.

Furthermore, if he remains married to Melania, he will also be the first gay president and the first lesbian president. He will also be the first lesbian president married to an immigrant! What a most glorious event for the democrats to celebrate.

[jeepster09]

Oh that's good!

[ct9kahrtoter]

Well, I guess that's one way to look at it.

[King Rat]

And if he refused to stand for the American Flag and anthem at a football game, they would really love him.

[wyntrout]

Hopefully, we'll have enough rain to get the sod growing in the backyard... kind of worried about the "patch" showing too much.

[Bobshouse]

But.....wouldn't that verify him as a true blood demoncrat?

[340pd]

Someone came up with a great suggestion. He says we should send Beto to Mexico that confiscate the guns of the drug cartel.

[jeepster09]

Irish Unemployment

---

Mick and Sean get laid off from their jobs at an underwear factory and head down to the unemployment office. Mick goes in first. Guy behind the desk starts with the form

"What's your Occupation?" the clerk asks Mick.

"Panty Stitcher" says Mick

"Allright, let me have a look in the books. Panty Stitcher comes up as unskilled labor, so you'll be getting 100 Euro a week in unemployment assistance"

Sean comes into the office next.

"And what's your occupation?" the clerk asks Sean

"Diesel Fitter" Says Sean

"Allright, let me have a look in the books. Diesel Fitter comes up as skilled labor, so you'll be getting 200 Euro a week in unemployment assistance"

When Mick finds out that Sean is getting double what he's getting, he's furious and won't stand for it. He heads right back down to the unemployment office, muscles his way past the guys standing in line and walks right up to the clerk.

"Why in the hell is he getting double of what I'm getting?" he screams at the clerk

"Because Panty Stitchers are unskilled labor, and Diesel Fitters are skilled labor"

Mick thinks for a moment and sits down, staring at the clerk behind the desk.

"So you're telling me, sewing elastic into panties and thongs is unskilled. But Sean sitting next to me, picking them up when I'm done, sticking them on his head and saying "Yep, Diesel fitter" is skilled labor?

[jeepster09]

Where are my chips.....

https://youtu.be/kkqHpHV5Azk

[wyntrout]

A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious.
She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed.
Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English.

Getting There:
Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests.
The Hotel:
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with them self.
The Restaurant:
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.
Your Room:
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity! .. You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.
Bed:
Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.
Above All:
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it.