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Thread: Brrrrrright New Year....

  1. #21
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Twin Cities MN.
    Posts
    5,789

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    Are you a Republican, a Democrat, or a Southerner?

    This little test will help you decide:

    You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two young children.

    Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you…

    You are carrying a Kimber 1911 chambered in .45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

    ******************************
    Democrat’s Answer:

    Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question! What is a Kimber 1911 and what does .45 ACP mean?

    Does the man look poor or oppressed? Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

    Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?

    Does the pistol have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

    Is it possible he’d be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

    Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

    I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus. This is all so confusing!

    ******************************
    Republican’s Answer:

    BANG!

    ******************************
    Southerner’s Answer:

    BANG!
    BANG! BANG!
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    Click…..

    (Sounds of reloading)

    BANG!
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG!
    Click.

    Daughter: “Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Speer Gold Dots or Federal Premium hollow points?!”

    Son: “Can I shoot the next one?!”

    Wife: “You are NOT taking that to a Taxidermist!”


    __________________
    "Life Member NRA"
    I am addicted to brake fluid...don't worry I can STOP at anytime!

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Round Rock, Texas
    Posts
    5,152

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    😂🤣😅❤️
    A man can never have too much red wine, too many books, or too much ammunition
    -Rudyard Kipling

  3. #23
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Location
    Central Floriduh
    Posts
    2,496

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    Ooooh! Some good one’s Jeepster!

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Central MN
    Posts
    4,128

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    "Never pet a burning dog"

  5. #25

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    A life-long Vikings fan had attended many games over the years and had gotten to know several of the players. During his declining years, he was planning his funeral and told his wife that when the time comes would she please contact six former Viking players on his list and ask them if they would serve as pall bearers at his funeral. Surprised at this request, she asked him why he wanted them instead of family or friends.

    He replied, “I want them to let me down just one more time.”

  6. #26
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Central MN
    Posts
    4,128

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    "Never pet a burning dog"

  7. #27
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Central MN
    Posts
    4,128

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    "Never pet a burning dog"

  8. #28
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Round Rock, Texas
    Posts
    5,152

    Default

    True
    Attached Images Attached Images
    A man can never have too much red wine, too many books, or too much ammunition
    -Rudyard Kipling

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Twin Cities MN.
    Posts
    5,789

    Default

    Attached Images Attached Images
    "Life Member NRA"
    I am addicted to brake fluid...don't worry I can STOP at anytime!

  10. #30
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Central MN
    Posts
    4,128

    Default

    "Never pet a burning dog"

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