May mischievousness

[JohnR]

^^ Brandon looks like Carter, there.

[GROTMAN]

To all those thinking of moving here, or just visiting, be aware of the following especially all the people wanting to move here from New York and California as well as many other heavily populated cities across the country.


Before you come to North Carolina to visit you must be aware of what is happening here. Especially, around the north Georgia mountains, rural areas and along our beautiful coast. There's a housing shortage, rent has tripled, and folks are vacationing here in record numbers...

So if you plan on moving here, or just plan on vacationing on our beaches, river bottoms, mountains or lakes this summer, I think you should know that wolf spiders, fire ants and bedbugs have infested hotels and motels across the state due to dryer than usual weather. The woods will eat you alive with ticks and chiggers.

Our lakes are full of snapping turtles gators, fresh water sharks, and creepy old guys wearing speedos.
Our rivers are full of drunks in tubes peeing themselves while the banjo players lay waiting in the bushes.
Panthers have eaten many domesticated animals and possibly some small children.

The local bear and coyote population are all 'in heat' and think your wife/girlfriend is hot.

Snakes... don’t even get me started on the Water Headed Copper Moccasins,, the Diamond Back Rattler Cobras and the Death Adder Pythons.

The poison ivy has overtaken all other vegetation.
We have had bear sightings at every park and town they are after your picnic baskets….and some cougars have been spotted in motel rooms and bars.

Watch out for the armadillos, they have been extremely aggressive this season.

In North Carolina we have the Skunk Ape invading our parks and it’s their mating season. Porcupines are "stabbing" small children should they dare to utilize the local playground equipment.

Skunks have multiplied at unprecedented rates and wander the local campgrounds in packs looking for beer.

Murder hornets!?! We’ve got great black clouds of murder hornets, and swarms of giant crickets and even some Oklahoma grasshoppers.

Scorpions have been congregating in massive quantities under rocks, logs, wooden steps, automobiles, and tarantulas are now stealing peoples food and biting like crazy.

I’m pretty sure all private tiger owners (we had a jump in them after Tiger King) have released their cats into the streets of our cities and towns.

Head lice now fly and we have vampire bats. Oh, and no one is vaccinated. I think you should stay in New York and California. The tourist ads I see on TV say those are great places.

[JohnR]

Nice! I guess Covid got the murder hornets. We don’t hear about them any more.

[getsome]

We lived in Charlotte N.C. From 1982 until 1991 and it was a very nice, beautiful small town, big city at that time but my company shut down that office and we came back to Atlanta which was home and while I was born and raised in Atlanta Ga. it has become a war zone with several shootings/murders every day by 14 year olds with guns and it has become insane to even walk around here and there are almost daily road rage shootings for no reason other than somebody was driving too slow……..Atlanta has become a dangerous jungle and I am thinking selling the house and moving to the mountains may be a smart thing to do what with Brandon’s new economy and teen gang wantabe’s everywhere wanting to prove their manhood…… I would much rather deal with panthers, poison turtles and killer bees than urban rage filled killers and a Democrat run City that arrests hard core criminals then puts them back to the street because they are “woke” and just don’t care…..

[JohnR]

We just bought a lot near Hayesville, NC, just across the border from Hiawassee. We plan to retire there.

[dao]

To all those thinking of moving here, or just visiting, be aware of the following especially all the people wanting to move here from New York and California as well as many other heavily populated cities across the country.


Before you come to North Carolina to visit you must be aware of what is happening here. Especially, around the north Georgia mountains, rural areas and along our beautiful coast. There's a housing shortage, rent has tripled, and folks are vacationing here in record numbers...

So if you plan on moving here, or just plan on vacationing on our beaches, river bottoms, mountains or lakes this summer, I think you should know that wolf spiders, fire ants and bedbugs have infested hotels and motels across the state due to dryer than usual weather. The woods will eat you alive with ticks and chiggers.

Our lakes are full of snapping turtles gators, fresh water sharks, and creepy old guys wearing speedos.
Our rivers are full of drunks in tubes peeing themselves while the banjo players lay waiting in the bushes.
Panthers have eaten many domesticated animals and possibly some small children.

The local bear and coyote population are all 'in heat' and think your wife/girlfriend is hot.

Snakes... don’t even get me started on the Water Headed Copper Moccasins,, the Diamond Back Rattler Cobras and the Death Adder Pythons.

The poison ivy has overtaken all other vegetation.
We have had bear sightings at every park and town they are after your picnic baskets….and some cougars have been spotted in motel rooms and bars.

Watch out for the armadillos, they have been extremely aggressive this season.

In North Carolina we have the Skunk Ape invading our parks and it’s their mating season. Porcupines are "stabbing" small children should they dare to utilize the local playground equipment.

Skunks have multiplied at unprecedented rates and wander the local campgrounds in packs looking for beer.

Murder hornets!?! We’ve got great black clouds of murder hornets, and swarms of giant crickets and even some Oklahoma grasshoppers.

Scorpions have been congregating in massive quantities under rocks, logs, wooden steps, automobiles, and tarantulas are now stealing peoples food and biting like crazy.

I’m pretty sure all private tiger owners (we had a jump in them after Tiger King) have released their cats into the streets of our cities and towns.

Head lice now fly and we have vampire bats. Oh, and no one is vaccinated. I think you should stay in New York and California. The tourist ads I see on TV say those are great places.

All you needed to do Grot was tell them about the Trump rallies that take place every night in every town and city. That would keep the Yorkians and Commifornians away.

[tokuno]

For years during every football bowl season, while the rest of the country huddled indoors against polar weather, I've decried the benighted television producers, with their lingering, panoramic television shots of beautiful, sunny, 72 degree California vistas of gently waving palm trees lining broad bays of sparkling waves crashing onto bikini-laden beaches.
How I wish they'd instead shown the Watts section-8 housing, Bakersfield in Panavision, icy & dirty Santa Cruz beaches, hotel receipts with their endless add-on taxes, & side-by-sides of California gas prices with anywhere else in the country, and maybe a shot of SF 1BR studio apartment prices & some MLS listings.
If only we could wind the clock back and adopt Grotman's approach.
To assist your effort, per my son, just convince the left-driven diaspora that Camp Lejeune is representative of all the rest of North Carolina.

[340pd]

[img] [/img]

[mr surveyor]

I used to identify as an old, rotten wood fence post .... I now identify as a bicycle seat

[Bawanna]

Good plan!